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Saving the Left...Damn that Parmenion!

Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:19 am
by Nicator
Alexander: Mr. Coenus, How long will it take us to make it back to the left wing?

Coenus: Judging by the state of the horses, the terrain, and the likelyhood of extreme resistance we will likely face, I calculate with a probability of 8.446584 to 1 that it will take us approximately 34.63 minutes.

Alexander: Philotas...you have fif.....teen minutes...to get this....war machine tooooothe left!

Philotas: Captain, the horses have taken a pounding...and the Agrianes will have to be taken out and reconfigured before I can get this machine anywhere.

Alexander: Philotas, that's an order!

Coenus: Captain, according to my calculations, if we leave now, we will not arrive until the left has been annihilated. The logical course of action would be to let Parmenion crumble and head for Darius.

Alexander: [Again looks left, then ahead to Darius' chariot trailing an ever lengthening dust cloud behind it in the distance] Never tell me the odds! [camera slowly closes in on Alex's face] Darius...will make aaaamistake soon...enough. And whennnnhe does...I'll be there. [fade to stupid Coke commercial about teaching the world to sing followed by previews for laugh-in]